Slipgate Conspiracy: The real reason the Wizards traded John Wall

Kyle Terada-USA TODAY Sports Warning: this is an entirely speculative conspiracy theory based on few facts and loosely connected assumptions. It is also tainted by years of dark, cynical fandom that only a Wizards fan can understand. Having said that, this theory explains John Wall’s abrupt departure from Washington in a way that actually makes sense.

Let’s go back to the year just before John Wall signed his ridiculous-max four year $171.1 million contract. For those of you doing the math at home, that’s $42.7 million per year or $521,000 per 48-minute game. But let’s not get ahead ourselves with silly assumptions like people who sign contracts to play professional basketball for the…