A Thanksgiving roast for the Apple Cup

Photo by William Mancebo/Getty ImagesI have been training for the following article my whole life. In the spirit of the holiday, I will roast the Washington Huskies about as hard as our overcooked turkey. This year, the joke is on UW. Let’s get it.

First, you spell the word “dog” wrong. I don’t care to be corrected about this, I don’t need it explained to me. I will mute all of you illiterate ‘dawgs’ on Twitter.

Next: purple and yellow, while allegedly “complementary”, actually makes me want to throw up- it is the worst color combination, and you can’t tell me otherwise. Maybe I feel that way because I was raised correctly. I can see why people “bow down”- it’s simply to avoid looking at…