Welcome to the Sweet Sixteen edition of The Bilas Index, the most wide-ranging, glorious, absolute, astute and discerning directory of basketball acumen and achievement known to the free world. This catalog of knowledge is compiled by the most elegant, gifted and pretentiously brilliant basketball mind in the universe -- The Bilastrator himself.
The Bilas Index brings order to chaos, clear-minded intelligence among the crazy nut jobs in the crowd and clarity to ambiguity. The Bilas Index will not only win your office pool, it will make you smarter, better looking and more interesting at parties.
The Bilastrator told you not to buy into the hype of "parity," a mythical concept chirped at every upset by the Parity Parrots, who are too simpleminded to know the difference between an upset and equality of ability.