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Alexandra Petri: Shark Person (The Stormy Daniels Story in the style of ‘Cat Person’)

Like many viewers (including my colleague Christine Emba), I was struck by Stormy Daniels’ remarks on “60 Minutes” that she wound up engaging in a sexual encounter with Donald Trump because “I had it coming for making a bad decision for going to someone’s room alone.” I think the best way of showing how screwed up this is is to rewrite her account à la “Cat Person.”

Stormy met Donald on a weekend night in the middle of July 2006. He was there to play golf, and she was riding around the golf course in a golf cart as part of a promotion.