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UCF's proposed lazy river a sign of whacked-out times

In his address to Congress Tuesday night, President Trump proposed a $1 trillion infrastructure bill that will build thousands of projects and create millions of jobs.

He must have missed Monday’s press conference at UCF.

The Knights beat Trump to the punch when they unveiled their “We Rise and Conquer” project. To be clear, it will not be part of the plan to repair America’s decaying infrastructure.

It will focus on something far more important.

Football.

Specifically, constructing facilities that will wow 17-year-olds into playing the sport at UCF. The biggest wow factor will be the lazy river.