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Already villains, the Astros should stop apologizing and go full heel

As apology tours go, this thing hit black ice three exits back.

The Houston Astros tried silence. They tried remorse or regret or something. I’m not sure exactly. They oversteered. They tried press conferences in which they summoned the vibes of a fifth-grade oral report. They even, way back when, tried denials. They understeered. Soon, they’ll point out that they are, if you really think about it, victims. Give it time.

None of it worked. Nor, by the looks of things, will it work. In the end, everybody ends up counting their teeth in a ditch.