The group stages of the 2020-21 Champions League took the feel of a decent romantic comedy: there were just enough unexpected plot twists to make you doubt how things might end, but then it all wrapped up how you expected it to all along. (As always in rom-coms, the supporting cast -- from Marcus Rashford's counter-attacking to Neymar's nutmegs, to Weston McKennie's incredible karate kick goal -- drove the film. They were the Aubrey Plaza and Mary Steenburgen to UEFA's Happiest Season. But I quickly digress.)
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