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Lookout Landing · Jun 15, 2019

The Lookout Landing Father’s Day Gift Guide

Photo by Stephen Brashear/Getty ImagesHello and welcome to the Lookout Landing Father’s Day Gift Guide! As a dad I am eminently qualified to give advice about What Dads Want. Unfortunately, none of that advice is contained here.

Look, I have so many thoughts. First, stop trying to make “Roll deep” happen. It’s not going to happen. Next, what in the hell is this even saying? “Seattle Mariners! Roll deep with the empire.” “Seattle Mariners Roll Deep With the Empire.” NONE OF THESE OPTIONS MAKE SENSE. Why didn’t they give Darth Vader a Light Bat? At least try to crossover brand. Also, as Grant Bronsdon said when we found this: WHO STANS THE EMPIRE?

I need to lie down.

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