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Anticipating the 2020 Mariners Opening Day roster

The screeching sound you hear is the Mariners 2019 season being put firmly in the rearview mirror. If that is NOT the screeching sound you’re hearing, please contact the authorities. Assuming the best, things are trending positively for Seattle, which means they are distancing themselves from their worst season since 2011. Calling what is to come an improvement depends on your perception. Is it better when your neighbor’s dog rips up your flowerbed, or if your precious, fluffy angel tears up the petunias?

The Mariners prefer the latter, turning incidents into learning opportunities instead of neighborhood-wide intrigue.