[A helicopter descends from the sky in Piscataway. Donald Trump emerges]
You already know this. My name is Donald Trump, and I'm running for President of the United States of America. Stop laughing, you look like a moron when you're laughing.
I've been busy flying children around Iowa in my helicopter, but that doesn't mean I don't have BIG PLANS for Rutgers University, which is the YUUUUUGE-EST and MOST LUXURIOUS State University in my home state (well, one of them), New Jersey. I love Rutgers. There are really terrific people there, truly fabulous. Together we are going to MAKE.