Around the Forest: Caleb pretends he's an optimist

Noteworthy links from Stumptown and the rest of the web on 5/12/16.From the Wide World of Soccer:

Orlando SC Coach Adrian Heath slapped with a 1 game ban for stepping onto the field. [The Mane Land]

Masato Kudo got LIT UP last night by Chicago Fire keeper Matt Lampson. Yes, that required all caps. [Deadspin]

A majority of Miami-Dade county voters support Beckham's plan for a new stadium in a poll. Also related: most citizens who participate in polls have no idea about the subject matter that they are being asked about. [Miami Herald]

In an interview, MLS Commish Don Garber decided to just sit around and list random facts like "The sky is blue," "Bacon is delicious," and "Liga MX is better than…