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Dragnet 2017: The Case of the Missing Penguins

Since last night’s 4-0 loss to the Flyers wasn’t much to write home about, I thought I’d do an abbreviated game summary in the style of the old TV series, Dragnet 1967.

Cue the opening music. Sergeant Joe Friday and Officer Bill Gannon, on loan from the LAPD, knock on the front door to the home of Polly Penzfan. Dressed in a Sidney Crosby jersey, Polly opens the door.

Polly: May I help you?

Friday: I’m Sergeant Friday and this is Officer Gannon.