If you look up and down many of today’s football rosters, you are bound to find some interesting names. Some of those names are great on their own, others if combined with a phrase may be clever or hilarious, a-la ESPN’s Chris Berman. Here is our compilation of the best names in the conference today.
Jake Glatting “Gun” - P
Isaiah “Shaft” Hayes - DB
Jake “Gold” Laudenslager - RB
Isaiah “Forever” Strong - DB
Laythe “Super” Freikh - OL
Gerhard “Who’s Bringing” De Beer - OL
Tashon “It’s Not a” Smallwood - DL
Dougladson “Not So” Subtyl - DL
Jojo Wicker “Chair”- DL
Koron “Get” Krump - LB
Tyson “Mercury” Rising - OL
Jesse “Don’t Date Your” Cozens - OL
Michael “Don’t Fall a” Sleep-Dalton - P
Devonte “I Live For Fourth” Downs - LB
James Looney “Tunes” - DL
Evan “First Blood” Rambo - DB
Quentin “Sweet” Tartabull - DB
Evan “Leave It to” Weaver - LB
Poutasi Poutasi “the Lineman So Nice They Named Him Twice” - OL
Derrion “the Last” Rakestraw - WR
Bryce Bobo “the Clown” - WR
Juwann “I Want to Be” Winfree - WR
Chris “Honey” Graham - K
Pookie “Monster” Maka - LB
“I’ve Got a Fever, and the Only Cure Is” Mo Bandi - OL
Jonathan “Woodchuck” Huckins - OL
Malik “Leave It or” Lovette - WR
Brady “Cool” Breeze - DB
Troy “Tie” Dye - LB
Brenden “I Ride My Skateboard to” Schooler - DB
“T” Rex Manu - DL
Landry “Bring the” Payne - DB
Wesley “Brought the” Payne - LB
Timmy “and the Lords of the Underworld” Hernandez - WR
Ryan “Wrecking” Nall - RB
Thor “Hammer” Katoa - LB
Phillip Napoleon “Dynamite” - DL
Tuli “Wet” Wily-Matagi
Harry “Use the” Schwarts - WR
Bobby “Okra” Okereke - LB
Bryce “Guy” Love - RB
Trevor “Rise to New” Speights - RB
“Little” Bo Peek - DL
Scooter “Sasha” Harrington - TE
“Just” Soso Jamabo - RB
“I’ve got” Josh Woods - LB
Josh “Stop and Smell the” Rosen - QB
Bolu “You Better” Olorunfunmi - RB
John “My Parents Are Original” Johnson - DB
Mossi “Oak” Johnson - WR
Scott Quessenberry “Pie” - OL
“I’m the” Boss Tagaloa - DL
Marvel “Show and” Tell III - DB
Jamel “I’m Not a” Cook - DB
Davonte “Straight Outta the” Nunnery - DB
Toa “From Dusk til” Lobendahn - OL
Kenny “Deuce” Bigelow “Male Gigolo” Jr.