Move over, Christmas.
I learned the rules of football and the basics of the game back in middle school. Not by playing, of course. Goodness, no. Anyone who has met me can tell you that I was not put on this earth to play football. My greatest accomplishment in the sport is that I was present for the intense game of backyard football when the Frosty Beers Super Play was unveiled, an unstoppable trick play that Urban refuses to run no matter how many times I tweet him about it. Also, it's probably illegal in actual football.
No, I learned the game because of marching band.