As we all are keenly aware, this Saturday presents the perfect opportunity for Northwestern Football to one-up the Northwestern Basketball loss to Merrimack last Friday. This race to rock bottom is much like the race to the bottom of a Malört bottle: nobody really wants or needs it, it’s purely out of desperation, and is currently unique to the Chicago area.
Since neither Northwestern nor UMass will be anywhere near a bowl game this season, thus was born the Malört bowl.
Malört, for those who are somehow unaware, is a type of Bäsk Swedish Liquor.