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Summer Survival Guide 2018

Before we get started — I know that summer is almost over. Life kept getting in the way of this year’s Summer Survival Guide. As some of you may know I’ve had a lot on my plate this summer. Okay, enough with the excuses. It’s time to make with the silly.

Is it really August already? We’re officially adrift in the doldrums of the offseason, haunted by mirages of KHL free agent rumors whilst we collectively crave the soft, pink flesh of rum-ham. This year’s doldrums feel particularly dull because the Rangers didn’t throw Scrooge McDuck levels of money at free agents on July 1.