GET THE LOW DOWN ON YOUR TEAM'S NEW STARS FROM A LARGE AND DERANGED LOOKING BABY.
[Scene: Studio desk at your local TV affiliate that covers your favorite college football team. The anchor, who is wearing a shirt, tie, blazer, and a pair of Chicago Bulls shorts, shuffles papers as a producer approaches.]
"One minute."
"Who's our guest tonight anyway? Usually I would've heard by now."
"Oh, it's uhhhh [flips hurriedly through papers on a clipboard]... King C-- wait a minute, King Cake Baby? That weird thing that shows up at Pelicans games?"
"You're joking, right?