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The Revue: Kicking it old school on Senior Night

I love when Mizzou takes it easy on me. I wish they’d do it more often.

Writing about the Tigers is fun and all, but sometimes I feel like I’m entering a Lovecraftian plane trying to describe the different fashions in which they screw up or lose. This year has been a cacophony of calamities, a cornucopia of misery and woe. Here are the movies I’ve compared Mizzou losses to this season.

The Happening, a movie that I’ve seen people go cross-eyed trying to explain

Doubt, a movie about deep religious trauma and the ever-present danger of structural abuse, perfect for comparing to football

Now You See Me, a dramedy about magicians, which is really a self-own now that I think about the fact that I actually watched a dramedy about magicians

Glass, a movie that made me hate Samuel L.