Stock Market Report: 49ers

At some point in the off-season, you tend to get stir crazy for football. You start getting snippy with your friends and family, and with no Vikings news to really talk about, you start talking about easy topics, like politics, abortion, and religion , for example.

Maybe a little Middle East Peace problem solving exercise thrown in, just for good measure.

And juuuuuuuuust when you’re ready to start shanking people because damn it Susan if you mention that omnibus spending bill one more time that gives two million bucks for studying shrimp running on a goddamn shrimp treadmill I swear on the grave of my high school accounting teacher I’m going to carve your tongue out of your mouth with a…