Peak of the Week Open Thread: May 1, 2019

Brace Hemmelgarn-USA TODAY SportsFootball news is ramping up a bit after its annual hibernation, which begins when the Super Bowl ends, and lasts until the draft. For nearly 3 months, we get nothing but mock drafts and the occasional NFL story, which normally isn’t really about football, but some eager journalist twists, stretches, and connects a few dots to make it an NFL story. You know, the third-string defensive tackle’s aunt’s ex-husband’s third cousin’s hairdresser bought a new dog, and the dog had markings that look eerily similar to John Randle. Well, it turns out that the dog’s former owner’s second cousin’s ex-girlfriend’s uncle-by-marriage was best friends with John Randle’s brother, so obviously the third-string defensive tackle will have a monster year. He bought lots of that black eye shadow paint in preperation.................wow. Anyway, there’s actual football-y news now, so that’s good.

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