The only reliable trait of the 2022-2023 Miami Heat is that they’re consistently unreliable.
They’re that friend of yours who you can’t quite give up even if you know they’ll eventually let you down.
They’re that voice at the back of your head convincing you on a Sunday night that the upcoming week will be the onset of a better and healthier version of yourself, only for you to end up having a cookie by 3:00PM on a Monday afternoon.
They’re the classic sports team that shows all the signs of being mediocre, only you might refuse to believe it because of past success or for the slim chance that despite years of tangible evidence, they could just be one of the few teams in NBA history to defy the odds and get out of purgatory.