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Zach Mettenberger & Marcus Mariota -- TO THE DEATH!

In case you didn't heard, our beloved bearded quarterback has absolutely no plans on letting the No. 2 pick in the draft and 2014 Heisman Trophy winner take his job easily.

Of course, we love nothing more than a good old-fashioned trial by combat (hey, can't work any worse for LSU than what they've been doing, right?), so let's help Zach out. How should they do it? Let's decide!

Pistols at Dawn?

Swords?

Flail?
Wait, that can't be right.