If you followed the Los Angeles Dodgers at any point over the last decade, you probably have Feelings about Joe Kelly and Andrew Heaney — capital F intentional.
The pair of veteran pitchers left the game in true on-brand fashion this week, officially(ish) ending careers that spanned 25 combined Major League seasons, two World Series rings with LA, and enough late-inning adrenaline swings to last Dodger fans a lifetime.
Kelly didn’t technically “retire,” at least not according to Joe Kelly logic. He insists athletes don’t retire, they just … stop playing. And honestly?