Someday, maybe a decade from now, we'll see a feature-length film about Aaron Rodgers's summer of 2021. It'll open with the quarterback's engagement to actress Shailene Woodley. The second act will be a Hangover-esque account of the couple's Hawaii vacation with Miles Teller, where the actor says two guys jumped them in a bathroom. The finale? A high-stakes, office-room climax where the Green Bay Packers finally convince Rodgers not to become the permanent host of Jeopardy! and give up on his quasi-boycott of the team.
This movie—written, produced, and directed by Aaron Rodgers—will be called PETTY: The Brief, Wondrous Offseason of a Disgraced King.