Illuminati Picks, Week 8: Ed Orgeron faces his past

//stumbles up to podium

Um. Hi guys. The Illuminati Council is taking the week off, and uh....

//fumbles around in pocket

They had a message... while they’re off.... They’ve been trusting me with all the weekend selection summaries this season and they tasked me with, uh, delivering it to you all....

//awkwardly unfolds sheet of paper

Okay, here goes:

“GREETINGS, EARTH CITIZENS. THE COUNCIL HAS FOREGONE THIS WEEKEND’S ADDRESS TO YOU IN ORDER TO BRING TOGETHER THE COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFF COMMITTEE. SOME OF THEM MUST BE RECALLED FROM FAR AWAY WHILE OTHERS MUST BE AWOKEN FROM STASIS. IT IS A LONG PROCESS WE DO NOT WISH TO DISCUSS AND YOU SURELY DO NOT WISH TO HEAR. IN THE MEANTIME, PLEASE HUMOR THE…