WEEKLY GREETINGS, EARTH CITIZENS. THE COUNCIL HAS DECIDED TO LET YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET. EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE ALREADY SELECTED THE WINNERS OF COLLEGE FOOTBALL GAMES IN ADVANCE, HOW THEY GET THERE IS STILL MOSTLY UP TO THEM. MICROMANAGING ALL OF THAT WOULD TAKE WAY TOO MUCH TIME, AND OUR SCHEDULES ARE BUSY ENOUGH AS IT IS.
THIS IS GOOD FOR US, AS IT MAKES LIFE SOMEWHAT LESS PREDICTABLE AND ALLOWS US TO HAVE THE OCCASIONAL MOMENT OF GENUINE SURPRISE AND AMAZEMENT, LIKE THE ONE THAT OCCURRED DURING LAST NIGHT'S STANFORD-UCLA GAME. SERIOUSLY, DID YOU SEE THAT CATCH BY FRANCIS OWUSU?