Alternate reality: NBA Groundhog Day 2016

Groundhog Day is a pretty strange holiday. What if in an alternate reality Punxsutawny Phil actually decided the fates of teams rather than of the coming of spring?

The incredibly strange holiday we celebrate every February 2, Groundhog Day, has it that if the groundhog emerges from its burrow and it's a cloudy day, spring will come early. If it's a sunny day and it sees its own shadow, it returns to its burrow and winter will continue for six more weeks.

Makes perfect sense.

In keeping with this very odd absence of logic I imagined if instead of deciding the fate of spring the groundhog seeing its shadow instead decided the fates of NBA teams. The well thought theory I came up with here is…