You might be saying to yourself, “self, why is MLS Decision Day happening on the second-to-last matchweek of the regular season instead of the actual last one?” You will likely receive no satisfactory answers. Meaning has become unmoored from language in our modern hellscape. Nothing matters anymore. We cannot escape ourselves.
As a practical matter, every game for Week 33 basically happened all at once. (Or as much as it can when you’re dealing with a country with four time zones.) Between the Fire game, Game 2 of the NLCS, and the new episode of Star Trek: Discovery, there’s no way I’m going to watch all the games to recap for you.