Growing up, we held an aesthetic that my Dad held (Grandfather and Uncles too). "Pretend you've been here before". As Greek immigrants, it was important to be seen as industrious to the outside community as a contributing presence. Being flashy brought dishonor to the community, it was inferred.
I played youth sports under that premise. Played for fun until anything became a blood sport, then you play to kill. But the action is on the field. Sure tensions lingered off the field, everyone knew the deal and revenge was reserved for the next scrimmage, practice or game ( until Punk clubs opened, then you took your grievance to the "dance floor").