My vows, hopes and resolutions for 2020:
† I vow to eat fewer hot dogs this year than in 2019. The hectoring from concerned, health-conscious, finger-wagging fellow columnist Rick Morrissey is more than my stomach can bear.
† I promise to visit our northern suburb of Milwaukee and watch a real NBA team, especially since on a late Friday afternoon I can get to Fiserv Forum as fast as I can to the United Center.
† I vow to keep pointing a finger of hilarity at the names of the ever-proliferating college football bowl games, wondering if the Cheez-It Bowl might give way to, perhaps, the 666 Cold Preparation* Bowl or the Nad’s Hair Removal for Men* Bowl or even the Broccoli Wad* Bowl.