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Orioles lose interminable pitchers’ duel to the Rangers in twelve innings, 2-1

Texas is the land where things are done big: “football stadiums, Six Flags places, and boomsticks called hot dogs,” explained Gary Thorne in the pregame segment. Not to mention Flamin’ Hot Cheetos sprinkled on top of hot dogs. And also, as of last night, copious errors, home runs, and bad pitching.

So what would happen when two lefties with the AL’s top-10 lowest starter ERAs met on a muggy day in June? Guessed Gary, “This could end up being the complete opposite of the ballgame we saw last night.”

Well, if you tuned out of Wednesday’s game and just checked the score on Thursday morning, the headline was one we all could have predicted: “League Ace Dominates Lowly Orioles.