Are you or a loved one "getting Concacafed?"
Are you experiencing symptoms of a referee giving you a yellow card for getting punched by another player? Have you felt confusion upon watching another man somersault across the grass in anguish after you shook his hand to congratulate him on a nice play? Ever seen a group of ball boys shrug their shoulders and sit, immobile, after a goalkeeper literally punted the ball into the Atlantic Ocean? Want to scream because you just lost a game on a field of knee-high grass against a team of players who spent most of the past week on a commercial fishing boat?