Marlins 6, Braves Pretty Much What You’d Expect

Julio Teheran got hung with the loss, which was kind of a shame since he only allowed two runs in the first and Brandon Cunniff was charged with four in the hellish eighth inning that I sincerely hope that very few of you were actually paying attention to. (I know I wasn’t; I was eating cupcakes and drinking Old Fashioneds at a wedding, which allowed me to experience the mirror opposite emotions to the experience of being a Braves fan in 2015. It was lovely.) None of that mattered much, of course, since the Braves offense eked across one in the third and one in ninth against the very back of the pen; the Braves’ 2-5 lineup slots went 0-12 and the whole of the “offense” mustered a grand total of five hits in 30 at-bats.

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