Cardinals 12, Braves 2

It felt like Julio Teheran had 20 of these starts last year. He got squeezed a bit, got dinked and doinked to death, the defense suffered a collective aneurysm — at this point, we should probably just call Erick Aybar E-6 and be done with it — and he left after four innings with five runs in. Then the gas-pail brigade came in from the pen and removed all doubt.

At the end of the third inning, it was 3-2 Cards. Then the Cards scored in the fourth, fifth, seventh, eighth, and ninth. Jason Grilli, our “closer,” came into the ninth inning of a 10-2 game and couldn’t even get three outs. After he walked the bases loaded, Fredi had to go get him and throw a sixth pitcher onto the tire fire. Then…