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Giving Away Money: Double-Sized Rivalry Week Edition wants to make you some cash!

I hope everyone is full, had a safe and happy holiday, and are thoroughly enjoying your Thanksgiving break. If you have to work? Well, it sucks to be you. I’m working too. So I feel your pain.

In thanks for all that I do for you throughout the year (and do so in utmost humility, I add), I ask only that you save me a plate of sides — but you can keep that hobo leftover turkey to yourselves. No, you didn’t brine it right. Yes, it’s drier than an 87-year-old nun. And don’t think you’re fooling anyone with that Honey Baked Ham either — I know damned good and well you don’t have a spiral slicer.