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Why Le’Veon Bell should just hurry up and retire

Le’Veon Bell, to quote Don Rickles whenever he roasted Dean Martin and/or Frank Sinatra: “It’s over. The voice is gone.”

Of course, I’m not referring to your voice, Le’Veon. That’s still in prime condition. No, seriously, I’ve heard your rap music: that’ll get picked up! Anyway, I’m referring to your legs, Le’Veon. They’re shot.

In fact, there’s strong evidence to suggest they were worn out as far back as 2017 when you toted the rock 60 more times than you did the year before and averaged nearly a yard less per carry. Your longest run that year was 27 yards.