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2015 Minnesota Vikings Season... RESULTS! FOR REAL! ALL THE PROMISES THIS TIME!

Things, feelings, and emotions… but MOST OF ALL, SEASON RESULTS IN ADVANCE!

OK so fine, accidentally burning the Tome of Knowledge last year didn't really help me in my attempts to accurately predict how the season would go. But it's OK! I figured it out this time. For real!

Look, I get you're all probably a bit down on my season predictions considering I've been wrong... like, 4 years running. But for real this time guys. Dr. Prometheus, Loki, a ragtag collection of psychic dogs, a pile of ashes that was once an ancient Egyptian Tome of Knowledge (nobody told me papyrus was flammable, I take no blame here)- these were all foolhardy attempts, I can accept this.