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Penn State faces backlash after setting $30 million on fire (SATIRE)

Penn State fans were dismayed to learn that their embattled athletics department has found itself in hot water again.*** This time, for burning metric tons of specially dyed paper product without a permit. The news broke following the announcement that PSU head coach James Franklin had agreed to a massive extension that will pay him an average of $5.8 million per year. While this extension has drawn praise from most PSU fans, it’s drawn a critical eye from Pennsylvania’s regulatory and judicial agencies.

Why the sudden scrutiny? It turns out that Nittany Lions athletics director Sandy Barbour had forgotten to file some key paperwork.