I've been on a self-imposed Michigan football hiatus for the past 48 hours. My grief/anger/shame tornado has spun for just about long enough.
If a genie with Robin Williams's voice hopped out of a lantern I was inspecting on my weekly antique store runs and asked me my dream Michigan record through 7 games, I would have said 7-0. But if he would have said, "cha bro? with that defense?" I would have said, "lol yeah, ur right, 6-1." This is where we're at brohams, we're at 6-1 and 2-1 in the Big Ten. Did we lose to Michigan State? Yes. Does that make me angry? Yes. Will one more year of Dantonio's face frozen on the smug setting invariably take 7-11 years off my life? Yes. If I had kids would I have hit them on Saturday? No, but combined with a bad report card I might have.
So those were supposed to be reasons to be happy and the video below is a reason to be sad. Not only did that flamboyance of jabronis beat us, they beat us playing dirty.
William Gholston - Being a class A jerk. Yeah you pal.
Now ol' Will most certainly got carried away with the rivalry. Twisting face masks, punching people and wearing a Colorado State jersey the entire game were all examples of #2 taking it too far.
All those words typed, we need to move on and there is hardly a better way to do that then by laughing at other people's misfortune. Let's see how Will's dirty, grimy, low-cost shot stacks up in the pantheon of college football's cheap shots:
Jonathon Brown plays pin the knee on the testicle:
Purdue - Northern Illinois - The People's Elbow meets the football field. Although the Rock never did it out of frustration...only triumph:
Washington - Arizona - Vuna has been consistently frustrated by his unpronounceable name. This is the result of that penned up frustration.
USC on Jake Locker - This thoughtful USC player tried to save him from a career of losing with the Tennessee Titans.
Troy Polamalu on Washington - He very nearly escaped punishment by running to the sidelines and trying to blend in with rest of the team.
LaGarette Blount and man most famous for getting punched by LaGarette Blount
Kellen Huston vs. Tiny Missouri Student - It's terrible that this happened but tell me you haven't been routing for something like this when students rush the field. Tell me you jerk, I dare you. You just watched the video again didn't you.
Nick Fairly vs. Aaron Murray's supple neck - Now I know you've rewatched this one several times, for completely different reasons than the video above.
Marcus Vick vs. Louisville Calf Muscle - Who would have thought that any of the Vicks had this type of anger or hate inside of them?
This just seems illegal...
My man Vontaze doesn't just choke:
Or just headbutt:
...he punches as well:
Just to show we're equal opportunity:
...and to show that we're not:
Finally, what you've all been waiting for, the most aggregious cheap shot in the history of cheap and shots:
That's a racist dog. I still don't like you Will Gholston.
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