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Happy Yordan Álvarez Day

As widely reported, the Astros have determined that lefty slugger Yordan Álvarez has nothing to prove at AAA, and will be called up in time to help celebrate Orbit's birthday. Which also happens to be the rubber game of an ugly series against the Orioles. Álvarez is mashing a healthy .343/.433/.742 at Round Rock which is, uh, pretty decent. Some of his plate appearances didn't even involve bats... I mean, can you even have an at bat without holding a bat?? And his defense may have suddenly improved as well...

Yordan Alvarez’s defense became good enough for the majors at the exact same time as it became millions of dollars cheaper to call him up.