//stumbles up to podium
Um. Hi guys. The Illuminati Council is taking the week off, and uh....
//fumbles around in pocket
They had a message... while they’re off.... They’ve been trusting me with all the weekend selection summaries this season and they tasked me with, uh, delivering it to you all....
//awkwardly unfolds sheet of paper
Okay, here goes:
“GREETINGS, EARTH CITIZENS. THE COUNCIL HAS FOREGONE THIS WEEKEND’S ADDRESS TO YOU IN ORDER TO BRING TOGETHER THE COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFF COMMITTEE. SOME OF THEM MUST BE RECALLED FROM FAR AWAY WHILE OTHERS MUST BE AWOKEN FROM STASIS.