It’s a sad day in America.
The Phenom is no more.
Today, September 18, is Christian Pulisic’s birthday. Our innocent, sweet boy is now a man. Yesterday he was a soccer prodigy with the world at his feet. Dreams of nine digit transfer fees and Ballons d’Or are a thing of the past. What’s left is just your ordinary 19-year-old soccer player, spiraling his way towards anonymity.
Zinedine Zidane, after receiving a Google Alert of Pulisic’s big day, slowly wipes away his name from his dry erase board of potential transfer market targets. Copy editors around the world are forced to delete descriptions such as “phenom” or “wunderkind” from their stories.