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Dear Indians: Please don't let Charlie Sheen throw out a first pitch

The Indians have won the pennant, which means over the next few days, you can expect to see a lot of references to Major League, the 1989 comedy about the team's unexpected underdog chase of championship glory. The fact that the idea of the Indians making it to the World Series was considered to be a laugh riot should tell you plenty about where the franchise was at that point in time—in 1989, Cleveland was 35 years removed from its last pennant, which was also its last playoff appearance. It should say even more that the Indians (spoiler alert, albeit for a 27-year-old movie) don't even win the World Series in Major League; the movie ends on the team winning the pennant, which was apparently as fantastical as the writers felt they could get before things became truly unbelievable.