Baseball's All-Old Man River Team

Look at what our beloved Detroit Tigers did yesterday for a centenarian on her birthday.   I find it interesting that she would go to a baseball game for her 104th birthday when she hadn't attended a game since 1936.  She hadn't watched a baseball game in person in 75 years, how else could she make it clear that she wasn't a huge fan of going ball park?  Her 75 year hiatus notwithstanding, apparently she was a huge Tigers fan and yesterday she  got to meet Al Kaline.  She said she hadn't been that excited since Christy Matthewson threw both halves of a double header at Old Ebbets field for Mugsy Mcgraw sometime in the Gilded Age.

When I'm 104 years old my only hope that my friends and family still wear the lockets that I've prepared for them which will contain small amounts of my cremated body.  Sure it sounds creepy but I defy you to figure out a way to never be forgotten besides having your loved ones carrying around small pieces of your body in perpetuity.

Speaking of old people, baseball has a special place for the elderly.  40 year old's decrepit bodies have littered major league clubhouses for years.  I'd like to take this post to honor baseball's old men who refuse to go home and spend time with their wife and kids and sit on piles of money.

I present you with baseball's Old Man River Team, first by presenting a few great seasons by old men in baseball:

Paul Molitor - 39 years old - 1996 - Minnesota Twins

225 Hits, 113 RBI, .341 and 18 SBs

Tony Gwynn - 37 Years Old - 1997 - San Diego Padres

220 Hits, 49 2Bs, .372 avg. 17 Hrs, 117 RBI, 297 lbs.

Pete Rose - 38 Years Old - 1978 - Philadelphia Phillies

208 Hits, .331 avg, .418 OBP, 20 SBs, 1 crippling gambling addiction

Andres Gallarraga - 37 years old - 1998 - Atlanta Braves

44 HRs, 121 RBIs, .301 avg, .397 OBP, thousands of gray hairs

Randy Johnson - 38 Years Old - Arizona Diamonbacks - 2002

24-5, 2.32 ERA, 260 IPs, 334 SOs, Cy Young, One dead bird, one very sweet, very outdated haircut

Nolan Ryan - 42 years old -  1989 - Texas Rangers

16-10, 3.20 ERA, 239.1, 301 SOs - One brutal Ventura beatdown and several oscar-worthy Advil commercial performances.

Not Great, Just Old

Jesse Orosco - 46 years old - 2003 - NY Mets

Julio Franco - 48 years old - 2007 - Atlanta Braves

Tommy John - 46 years old - 1989 - New York Yankees

Minnie Minoso - 54 years old - 1980 - Chicago White Sox

Satchel Paige - 46 and 58 years old, 1953 and 1965, St. Louis Browns, Kansas City Athletics

Charlie Hough - 46 years old - 1994 - Florida Marlins

The Future of Old People in Baseball - These players are all over 37 years old and are a still producing at level that suggests they'll be in the game a few more years.  It just goes to show that when you take care of your body like Bartolo Colon has, you can play well into your late 30's.  Eating healthy and having experimental surgeries that may or may not involve getting a Jax-like new arm sewn on your body does wonders.

Ichiro Suzuki

Bartolo Colon

Jamie Moyer - He plans to return in 2012 after Tommy John surgery, after going 9-9 last year with the Phillies.  He'll turn 50 on November 18, 2012.

Todd Helton

Derek Lowe

My god Bartolo's a beautiful man.

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